The past few weeks, I have had a very heavy heart because of the choices I have made. I have lost heart that God can truly heal me. I think over and over again that He will come to my rescue; yet, I never feel like He does. This has left me feeling alone a lot, even when I have loving people surrounding and encouraging me. It amazes me how quickly I forget that the God I love is sovereign, but I do each time my sin separates me from Him. Satan has used this attack on me so many times now that I guess I've just lost hope that it can actually get better.
But it will.
Although the pain is hard and time doesn't seem to be helping, it will. God is sovereign. He knows me better than I know myself. He's there, even when I feel abandoned. It is the truth of God's word that will help me to see. I know I can overcome the darkness, for the lover of my soul taught me of His power in the light. I will admit, it is easier to give up and leave everything behind; yet, isn't it so much more worth fighting for? Fighting for this relationship with the most intimate God there is? I think so, even if my heart doesn't feel that right now. This truth, it can set me free. My heart will wait for Him. Until then, I will keep my lamp burning bright in the hope that He will find me. Waiting.
When it feels like everything is falling apart, that's usually when God is putting it all back together..
Wait for me child, I'm in love with you. It's a solemn vow, I'll come back for you. I promise.
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